31 March 2009

Happy Hour

I'm at a bit of a loose end this evening as Mrsslippy is on nights (her last shift until April 27th - nice...), and ever the sophisticate, I intend to spend the evening watching shitty horror films and boozing.

Not quite sure what to drink because;
  • I've got no red wine
  • Tinned beer is for emergencies - not to quaff and enjoy
  • Running too low on tonic for G&T
I've decided to see if there's anything in the 'special cupboard' that needs a bit of a seeing to.

Ladies and gentleman, with absolutely no due consideration for my health and safety, welcome to Slippymark's Horror Cocktail Night.

First up's a long refreshing one.
Orange juice + grenadine + tequila = Tequila Sunrise.
Very pretty, and tastes lovely....

Served with pickled onion monster munch and Alien vs Predator: Requiem
Face huggers - love 'em. They make very affectionate pets so I hear.

Next, another long one.
Cherry brandy + gin + Benedictine + fresh lemon juice + soda water + a cherry = Singapore Sling

Some poor buggers just been found skinned up a tree. I blame the Predator. That's just how they roll. Not content with just predating, they have to go and defile the body. Sick fucks. I need a stiff drink

Cream liqueur + Grand Marnier = B52
I couldn't get it to settle properly, so just necked it straight down - as you're supposed to do anyway.

I need to get back to the film!
Scotch + Red Vermouth + Angastora Bitters + a cherry = Rob Roy

I really like this one. Possibly because I'm drinking it from my fancy cocktail glass, possibly it's bitters, or most likely, it's the warm fuzzy feeling I'm getting from the sudden rush of many spirits, and watching 2 alien creatures batter 7 shades of shit out of each other.

Are there 7 shades of shit? I suppose Dulux would tell us there are several hundred, but when it comes to the push (or not if you've been eating your fibre), is there really much variation on pale, light brown, mid brown, dark brown, and the Guinness shit? If you reckon there are discernible differences between these bog standards, then you're either ill, or scatalogically fixated of the Gillian McKeith variety.

Oh oh! Alien in the house! It's after Michelle Dessler from 24/Amy from Lost. Run Michelle/Amy! Call for Jack/Jack!

Phew she's safe (who'd have guessed). And that Alien punching into that guys head with his ramrod minimouth reminds me somewhat of my tales of eating Creme Eggs. Maybe I'm not concentrating, but isn't this film a bit shit?

And not 'so shit it's good shit', like Basketcase or Leprechaun. Just plain awful.

I think I need another drink, and another film.....

Dark rum + fresh lime juice + Angastora bitters + grenadine = Planters Punch

And lets see what Zone Horror has to offer...

Severed - now that's more like it..

A multi-national forestry company engages in genetic experimentation to increase logging yield in a remote section of forest. But the experimentation goes disastrously wrong, transforming a disparate group of loggers and environmental activists into the "infected" -- ravenous, zombie-like creatures who prey upon the few terrified survivors while they attempt to understand and control the disaster....
I think I might go and watch this somewhere a bit more comfortable, as otherwise I might end up asleep on the sofa.

Night all, me and Busta are off to bed to drink Baileys out of a shoe.

1 comment:

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